A Taste Of Summer And A Dream

I’ve taken a week off Blogosphere and now I’m back with a vengeance, and bound and determined to get back to blogging consistently this week. But sometimes I need a break from the deep (and not so deep) contemplation writing puts me in. Occasionally I need to take a break from thinking, so to speak, and just allow myself to enjoy a day without considering how I need to chronicle it through blogging. Just feel the experience privately.

It’s been a week of swimming lessons and Driver’s Ed and one bad hair cut. I’ve devoured the latest juicy Patricia Cornwell novel and thoroughly relished it. I’ve enjoyed several movies, watched Little Squirt frolic on the beach, and sat in the sun with friends, talking about nothing and everything. I’ve spent several cool evenings relaxing on the back deck with my husband and a glass of wine. That is how summers should be, filled with seemingly insignificant yet precious moments that I know I’ll be grieving come the winter months.

This summer is a bridgeway to change, and last night I had a dream: My three children were heading out the door to walk to school together in the snow. I was zipping up the coat of my youngest, and wrapping the scarf around his face. I was fulll of angst; wondering if I should drive them. The snow was swirling, and I didn’t want them to get cold in the blustery weather. Or injured. Or have someone hurt them. All kinds of fears filled my mind. So I verbally considered loading them into my car, but my daughter objected. “We’ll be okay, Mom,” she said. So I let them go on their own. I felt it was the right thing to do, even though it was hard to watch them walk away.

I sat on the beach today and processed my dream. Did the winter represent a New Season? My children will be heading to three different schools this fall. The oldest will be two states away, and the baby will be gone all day for the first time ever. It’s a Season of Change for sure. For all of us. I generally deplore change. I really do. But I keep holding onto my daughter’s reassurance in the dream, ”We’ll be okay, Mom.” And I’m going to have to trust that they will. But will I?