Bad Wind

We are, quite possibly, brilliant. We left a good 24 hours ahead of the storm and had beautiful, clear weather on our drive to Connecticut; only hitting bad weekend traffic while going over the George Washington bridge. But there was a beautiful view of the lights of Manhattan, so it wasn't awful.

We are packed tight in a home now filled with 5 adults, 2 teenagers, a 5-year-old and a toddler. And what is about childhood homes that can cause the sweetest of adults to regress into the patterns set by family and birth order? The years are wiped away in a flash.

One minute I was happily grocery shopping for upcoming holiday meals and putting together a gift basket for a sick brother-in-law. And then the conflict hit, like a twister without warning. This was over pizza. We wanted to stop in and eat, and he wanted to bring it home. So the tornado came upon us; beautiful pieces of the day completely broken and swept away like like debris. And as I tried to clean up the mess in the aftermath, I was left feeling shell shocked. What the heck just happened? How could we have been so completely misunderstood? About a frickin' pizza??! And can we hope to rebuild or should we just level this out and begin again?

Life is complicated, Folks. No matter how much you long for the Norman Rockwell picture, you realize that family holiday gatherings contain people who carry different world views and experiences in their pockets. And prisms through which they look at life. Even regarding pizza; take-out or dine in?

So I take a break and leave the crowded home, finding a quiet hideaway in Stamford with internet access, and blog. Writing away my frustrations and confusion and inner tantrum, hoping to return there a more peaceful, centered person. And then pour myself a big ol' glass of something wicked.