Friday, February 8, 2008

Heavy Brick For Sale


Sometimes I wish I was a left-brained person, who thrived on analysis and charts and graphs; able to keep her emotions in check and her feelings to a minimum. Analyze-schmanalyze and move on. Instead, God gave me a temperament type in which I feels emotions in bright colors and wear my heart on my sleeve; tender and vulnerable to the pokes and prods of the world.

I had some conversations with a friend early in the week which left me feeling misunderstood and frustrated. And I have carried feelings of hurt, anger and disappointment like a Heavy Brick into every compartment of my life all week long. This Heavy Brick has accompanied me to my drama rehearsal, the grocery store, and even to breakfast with friends. It’s joined me in bed at night, and shoved its way into a few of my dreams. I’ve asked it to leave me alone, but it keeps showing up everywhere.

And along with the carrying of the Heavy Brick, it's the time of the month when I've had hormones raging throughout my body, like gnats on speed. You know what I’m talking about. So I’ve wanted to take this Heavy Brick and sail it through the window of the grocery store when I found the cucumbers to be soft and over-priced. And I fantasized about taking the Heavy Brick and knocking it upside the head of the Idiot Security Guard at my daughter’s school, who wouldn’t let me drop her off at the side door when the front parking lot was flooded with cars backed up because of snow and a school bus accident. For the love of God, People! If a woman is PMSing and carrying some emotional baggage at the same time, JUST BACK OFF!! And provide fresh produce! (These are the times when I firmly believe in very strict gun control laws.)

I’m hoping the Heavy Brick will not tag along tonight, as I head out for dinner with Super Hubs to our Date Night. If it does, it comes uninvited. Hopefully, after a couple of glasses of wine and words of comfort from my loving husband (who just brought me home yellow roses- I’m feeling better already), the Heavy Brick will lose some of its weight and power. We’ll see. It’d be great if I could just leave it at the bar.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm such a fan of your writing. You're one of my favorite blogs.

Kelly said...

Thanks, Anonymous! That's so sweet!

Anonymous said...

It seems like I get bummed out more and more often in the past couple of years. I consider you and Super Hubs to be primary positive support sources. You both are very nice people who always seem to cheer me up and make life a little better. Just thought you might want to hear "Thanks" since you are feeling down. God bless you.

Kelly said...

Thanks, Jim. You're awesome!