Overdue Fines Are Worth It

God knew what He was doing when he did not make me a Pioneer Wife. Birthing me in the later part of the 20th Century was clearly brilliant. I would have, quite frankly, sucked at Frontier Living. I just don’t have the kind of tough constitution it what it would have taken to survive. A pedicure without a shiatsu chair massage is “roughing it” for me. And prairie chicken for dinner every night for months on end without sesame beef or lasagna thrown in for variety?? I’d starve! And please don’t get me started on the lack of jelly-bellies. Or indoor plumbing. Or flat iron to tame my naturally wavy tresses. Or Internet shopping. See?? I’d suck.

But here’s what would be the biggest challenge of all for me: The deficiency of books. Prairie Folk apparently only had one or two at the most. I don’t remember seeing Ma and Pa Ingalls taking their young’uns to the public library. I’m certain they had very little time to read, what with all the timber they had to chop and stuff.

So I am heartily grateful to those hardy, rugged pioneer ancestors who paved the way into the west so that we could have vacations in Disneyland. But I also feel dearly sorry for them for the lack of escapist reading. I could not have done it. I need my books like I need air. God surely knew what He was doing.